Wednesday, April 21, 2010


this isn't what i had wanted i didn't see the outcome before it was too late. now i sit and watch fate take it's place this isn't how it should have happened you without me it's an abomination is there no redemption? no salvation? i'm begging screaming on bended knees all that remains of us of you of me is memories. A hallow emptiness fills loves place close my eyes to see your face wrap my arms to feel your touch

Monday, January 18, 2010


The heart beats on as the tears fall down A lonely shadow on the ground A step toward the sun, fall into the moon A love gone way to soon Twisted lies and shattered hearts A mistake that caused us to part Lost in the middle caught in a draft Shards of my heart left in the aftermath A quick get away a new life already started The soul not cold for a dearly departed Cherished and adored so quick to fade away A heart not meant to capture ready not ready to stay Lost in the past no looking back A love I tried to give, one I let slack Lost in the heart buried in the tears My nightmares come true, all the fears

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Road Ahead

I walk a lonesome path, if anybody was to follow. I live a lonesome life, if anybody was to look. I'm a lonesome person, if anybody wanted to know. I have love in my heart that I allow. When the words were softly spoken, my world shook. What you see isn't always what it is, to you it may not always show. The followers, the lookers, the nosey people around. They would all be wrong as I sit with this smile on my face. Yes, beneath me one pair of footprints on the ground. I'm never really alone in any place. My thoughts are always shared, my love always given back. My heart full of song, my mind is at ease. I don't need you to give me your slack. My baby loves me and for you that is just a tease. Let them follow, let them look, let them pry inside of me. When their mouth drops open and their mind starts turning. It will be only then that I really let them see. For lonesome I am not, there is a future I am yearning. I am never alone, I have love inside. I am never alone, I have a hand to hold. Side by side and hand in hand. We walk a path unknown to you but with heads held up with all our pride. Together to the future, so bright, so full of hope and oh so bold. Don't give me your pitty or try to advise. Trust, that when I speak of this in my life. There are no moments when you hear sad cries. For I am taken, I am SOMEbody's wife. The road ahead unknown and unpaved. The road behind full of bumps and turns. Our love is strong it shall never fade. Walk your own path, and may your too learn.
What being loved is really about.
When you do, then you shall see.
What this life of love means to me.

Monday, November 23, 2009


As I look at the majestic sky As tears fall from my eyes I know you and I were meant to be I only wish I could make you see How much your love means to me I wish I could walk up to you And whisper the words that lovers do But now I sit here sad and blue Wishing I could be with you.

Thursday, November 12, 2009


When I need inspiration I look into your eyes So full of love and adoration Every day a new surprise Your gentle ways and caring touch Melt my heart to the core Hoping you feel my love as much Each touch leaving me wanting more The soft sensual of your voice Rings deep inside my mind Leaving you is not a choice Moving a head and not behind You are my inspiration My light in the darkest of times Full of love and admiration Easing my heart and my mind

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Gut Reactions?

There are times in your life when you are overcome by emotions that you just react instead of thinking. Sometimes that is good, like when you get the overwhelming desire to kiss your lover and before you know it you have them in your arms in a passionate embrace kissing deeply. Other times, your reaction could hurt not only your partner but yourself. I know this, I felt this. I've been through so much with my partner, so many ups and down and trivial things happened and through it all, my faith and my love never wavered never faultered. Everything we have been through always made us stronger together. Yet every now and then I let my emotions run before I can catch up to them and pull them back into order. Out of my mouth flies the first that pops into my head and heart and it isn't pretty. My first instinct when something really seems to hurt me deep inside, is to run. I've learned not to run as a first option, I've not wanted to run in a long time. Now if only I could get my mouth to stay shut when something hurts deep down, I might be able to stop their hurt from happening. I am not so much worried about my own hurt, I am pretty good at keeping it inside and not letting it ruin the moment or day, most times.. other times, well.. it isn't pretty. I usually end up questioning myself and doubting myself more than ever. Sometimes saying sorry doesnt seem like enough, its those moments when I wonder how I can fix their heart make them better make them see, I love them and need them and can't live with out them. One day..

Sunday, November 8, 2009

I dont even know where to start, first let me say the one who holds my heart means more to me that anything else, not only does she hold my hand and tell me all the wonderful things any woman would love to hear but I have to question my own thoughts and feelings because tonight i sat and I cried and cried and hurt and hurt and nothing that I could do could stop the pain i felt swelling up in m chest, actions speak louder than words and the smallest action echos through the valleys and hills and resonates in my head.. what would it be like if I were you and you were me and I was doing what you do how would you feel? would you question where my love laid and why i had to do the things I do if I always said you were enough? I've given everything I possibly can considering the circumstances, I have always let you be, what would yu do if you were me? So much has happened tonight so many bricks have been crushed in my wall, all in all... at the end of the day I am alone and your actions always speak louder than your words, no matter what I do will I ever EVER be enough or will yu always find a reason to be another, you always need to be somebody, when are you going to be just mine? That is all I ever want, to be just mine, but as life goes on and days pass by, I lose hope that I will ever be enough for anybody, even you no matter what you say, actions speak louder than words, they always have, they always will, even as my heart breaks in a million pieces and yu pick them up and put them back together, each little lie, each little touch to somebody else, everything you do, makes me feel like the biggest fool. I loved you then, I love you now. I will Love you all our tomorrows, I just want to know, what would you do if you were me and I were you doing what YOU do... Actions even the smallest action speaks louder than any word